Medical; 622 Jokes
Munna : Bole tu ye doctor log operation karne se pehle patient ko behosh kiyu karte hai?
Circuit: simple hai na bhai, patient khud operation karna seek na le .
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Doctor apne dost se: yar soch raha hon k is gaon main apna clinic khol lon.
Dost: Yar tumhara khyal to naik hai magar yahan ka qabristan chota hai.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Doctor: Meray pass aap k liay aik bad news and aik bohat bad news hai.
Patient: Well, pahilay bad news batain.
Doctor: lab k test results k baad aap 24 hours aur zinda rahain gay.
Patient: 24 HOURS!!! Aur bohat bad news?
Doctor: Mai aap ko 24 hours se talaash kar raha tha.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Nurse ka mangetar bari hasrat se: Janu, meri khuahish hai ke kash mera koi hadsa ho jaye to mai tumhare ward mai admit ho jaon, aur tum wahan meri khidmat karo.
Nurse (muskurate hue): Janu, tumhe mere ward mai koi hadsa nahi balkai moujza hi la sakta hai, kiyu ke mai Labour Room mai Delivery karwati hun.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Aik admi langrata hua hospital mai dakhil hota hai, usey dekh kar 2 doctor’s aapas main jhagrte hain,
Pahla Doctor: uski haddee toot gayi hai
Dusra Doctor: nahi us ka angootha nikal gaya hai.
Esi doran aik 3rd doctor ata hai aur kahta hai chaloo essi sai puch laitain hain, tou woh bolta hai, nahi meri too chappal toot gayi hai
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa To Doctor: “Main Susu Subha 6 Baje Karta Hu Aur Potty 7 Baje Karta Hu.”
Doctor: “Phir Isme Problem Kya Hai?” . . .
Santa: “Doctor Saab, Par Meri Aankh Subha 8 Baje Khulti Hai.“
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Dr.-Aapki Biwi Ab Sirf 2 Dino Ki Mehman Hai, I Am So Sorry!
Santa- Sorry Ki Koi Baat Nahi Hai Dr. Saab, Jab 20 Saal Nikal Gaye to 2 Din Bhi Nikal Hi Jayenge..
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
doctor to santa:- apke samne k teen daant tute kayse?.
santa:- ji biwi ne kadak roti banayi thi….
doctor:- toh khane se mana kr dete…..
santa:- ji wahin toh kia tha….:)
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Dr: aap ka weight kitna he?
Santa: chasme sath 75kgs.
Dr: aur chasme bager!
Santa: vo muje dikhta hi nahi...
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Aik sardar ko doctor ne kaha app ko Gas hoyi hai subha subha koyi game khela karen... Ab sardar g roz subha snake game kehlte hain apne mobile per... ;->
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Doctor:
Kaise Ana Hua
Pappu :
Tabiyat Theek Nahi,
seenay me Pain ho
Raha hai ,
Doctor :
Sharaab Peete ho ?
Pappu :
Haan Par Chota glass hi Mangwana...
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
1 Pagal hr waqt bolta tha
"Ghulail bnaoun ga or chirya ko maronga!"
1 din usko Paglon k Doctor k pas ly gaye or uska elaj ho gaya,
Dr: AB KYA KROGY?
Pagal: Shadi kron ga, Nokri dhoondon ga, Ghr bsaon ga,
Dr: Very Nice!!
Phir kya krogy!!
Pagal: Bchchon ko achhy school bhejon ga
Unka birthday manaon ga
Nekr or Shirt gift ayegi
Dr: Gud Gud! Phir?
Pagal: Unki Nekr sy lastic Nikalon ga
Phir?
Ghulail Bnaoun ga Or Chirya ko Maron ga....!
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Doctor: Ap k shohr thek ho skte hn Agr ap inka khyal rkhen
Tnsion na den
Larai na kren
Or
inki Khdmt krn
Husband: Dr ne kya kaha?
Begm: Dr ny jwab de dya ha
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Party main 1 khubsurat larrki ko daikh k 1 Doctor romantic mood main bola:
"U r such a beautiful girl i hav'nt seen before. I Love u & want to marry U"
Girl: "Ray bhai! tain Rangrri maa'n baat kr, mannay angreji koni aavay hay"!
Doctor: "kuchH bhi na bahan, tain Dua kr load-sheding band ho javey"
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Larki Doctor se:
Meri Skin Bohat Ziada Mulayem, Soft aur Sensitiv ha aur Mera Rung B Bohat Gora hai, Main Raat ko kya Laga kr Soya kron?
Doctor:
"KUNDI"....
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)