Medical; 622 Jokes
A young woman wasn`t feeling well, and asked one her co-workers to recommend a physician.
"I know a great one in the city, but he is very expensive. Five hundred dollars for the first visit, and one hundred dollars for each one after that."
The woman went to the doctor`s office and, trying to save a little money, cheerily announced. "I`m back!"
Not fooled for a second, the doctor quickly examined her and said, "Very good, just continue the treatment I prescribed on your last visit."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient to Doc: Aapne nurse bahut achhi rakhi hai,
uska haath lagte hi main theek ho gaya.
Doctor: Jaanta hu, thappad ki awaaz mujhe bhi sunai di thi.....
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Wife: Sunoji, doctor ne muze aek mahine ke liye aaram karne ke liye kisi hill station pe jane ko kaha hai, ab hum kaha jayenge ?
Husband: Dusre doctor ke paas.......
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Raat ka time jab Munna aur Chinkie apnay bed room mien so rahay thay to phone ki ghanti baji.
Voice: Aray doctor sahab jaldi aayeay! Meray betay nay blade kha liya hai.
Munna abhi jaanay k liye tayyar hi hota k dobara phone aata hai.
Voice: Doctor Sahab! Aab aanay ki koi zaroorat nahi, meray husband ko shave k liye doosra blade mil gaya hai.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Munna: Bolay to apun ko tera operation dobara karna paray ga.
Patient: Kyun???
Munna: Kyun k apun kay rubber k gloves teray andar hi reh gaye hain.
Patient: Agar yeh baat hai to mujhay jaanay do. Mien tumharay gloves ki payment kar doon ga.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Chiman: Doctor help me, mein jab baat karta huun to muje sirf awaaz sunai deti hai,
aadmi nahi dikhta.
Dr: Aaisa kab hota hai?
Chiman: Phone karte waqt.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Santa: Kaam wali shanti ko bulao.!
Wife: Kyun?
Santa: Doctor ne kaha hai, raat mein dawa khane ke baad shanti ke saath so jaana.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
One: Oye tera ek daant neela kyun ho gaya?
Two: Yaar maine ink lagayi hai.
One: Woh kyun.?
Two: Kyun ke aaj kal “bluetooth” ka zamana hai yaar…
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient: How much to have this tooth pulled?
Dentist: $100.00.
Patient: $100.00 for just a few minutes work?
Dentist: Well, I can extract it very slowly if you like.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient: 'Doctor, every time I eat fruit I get this strange urge to give people all my money.'
Doctor: 'Would you like an apple or a banana?'
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient: Doctor, what does the X-ray of my head show?
Doctor: Absolutely nothing!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Patient: Doctor, I think I need glasses.
Teller: You certainly do! This is a bank.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Jack went to see the camp nurse. I fell last night, he said. And I was unconscious for eight hours. The nurse was shocked.
How awful. What happened? I fell asleep!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A man who was very upset walked in to see his doctor.
“Doctor, you’ve got to help me!” he wailed.
“What seems to be the trouble?” asked the doctor.
“I keep having the same dream, night after night. There’s this door with a sign on it, and I push and push the door but I can’t get it open.”
“What does the sign say?” asked the Doctor. “Pull,” said the patient.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
The ninety-year-old man was in for his checkup when the nurse practitioner learned he was about to marry an eighteen year old girl.
“Now, Mr. Jenkins,” the nurse practitioner warned,
“you should know that when a man your age marries an eighteen-year-old girl, somebody could get hurt.”
The old man shrugged, “If she dies, she dies.”
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)