Death time

A Memon On His Death Time
My Wife Where R U?
Wife: Yes,I M Here
My Sons: My Daughters R U All Here? Yes: Papa
To Phir Brabar Wale Kamre Ka
Pankha Q Khula He?

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!) / 247 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

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Santa: Yaar aaj pehli bar maine accha kaam kya, jiss par logon ne mujhe bohat mara!

Banta: Woh kya..

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Banta: Toh logon ne kyun mara

Santa: Yaar, kyun ke woh sab log fire fighter thay!

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
1 udas pathan se pocha

1 Admi ne 1 udas pathan se pocha: Khan sahab ap q udas hai?

Pathan: aj hum ko
N.W.F.P ka Mutlab pata chal gaya

Admi: wo kiya??
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“NO WOMEN FOR PATHAN”

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
C.I.D

Why I Hate C.I.D :(

An Example:
LADY: Rahul Mera Bhai Tha

DAYA: Kya? Rahul Tumhara Bhai Tha?

LADY: Han, Rahul Mera Bhai Tha

ABHIJEET: Rahul Sach me Tumhara Bhai Tha???

LADY: Ha Sir...Wo Mera Bhai Tha.

ACP: My God, Iska Matlab, Tum RAHUL Ki Bahen Ho ...

by Muhammad Zeeshan (few years ago!)
Machchar ne apni wife

Machchar ne apni wife ko divorce de diya
Pata hai kyu
..

..

..

..

..
.
.

.

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Bolta Hai..
uske bachhe ki Ragoon me kisi aur ka khoon tha!

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Agar tum mere pati hote

Girl: Agar tum mere pati hote to main tumhari coffee mein zeher mila deti!

Boy: Aur agar tum meri wife hoti to main vo coffee zarur pi leta.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
What do you mean

Santa: What do you mean, u got that black eye from a fire?

Banta: My wife caught me kissing an old flame.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
great pathan

Ek indian ny pathan ko tang karnay k lie uss sy pocha:
"Pakistanion" aur kutton me kitna farq hau?

Pathan replied: sirf "border" ka.

by kashif rashid (few years ago!)
28 International Rules Of Manhood

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

26: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher. Class Ka Group Photo

Teacher. Class Ka Group Photo Dikhatey Huye:

"Jub Tum Baray Ho Jao Ge Tou Herat Se Photo Ko Dekho Ge Aur Kaho Ge Ke:

Yeh Nida Hai Jo Amarica Chali Gai.
...
Yeh Sana Hai Jo Londan Chali Gai.

Yeh Pappu Hai Jo Wahin ka Wahin Hai".

Pappu Jal Kar Bola:

"Aur Yeh Humari Teacher Hain Jin Ka Inteqal Ho Chuka Hai"

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Gayon mein aik shakhs ka inteqaal ho gia

Gayon mein aik shakhs ka inteqaal ho gia aik saheb tazyat kay liye in kay betay kay pas gaye aur poocha marhoom ko kia bimari thi.

Betay nay jawab mein kaha burhapa khood aik bimari hai.

Woh saheb bolay: Waqai hamaray mohallay mein bhi teen char bachay isi bimari mein maray hain.

by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
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