Men; 1817 Jokes
A Sardar came to the office of The Hindustan Times to place an advertisement announcing his father’s death.
“The rate is Rs. 360 per single col. cm,” the clerk told him.
“Main toh lut jaoonga,” exclaimed the Sardar.
“My father was 182 cms tall.”
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Sardar Apna Radio Theek Karwanay Shop Pe Gaya.
Dukandar: Radio To Theek Hai
Bas Mousam Kharab Honay Ki Waja Se Chal Nahi Raha.
Sardar: Theek Hai,
Te Mousam Nawa Pa Day.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ques: Agar dunia mai bejli nahi hoti tu TV kesay daikhty?
.
Pathan: Mom-batti jala ke !
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
santa shopkeeper se
santa: muje mere car me nayi battery lagwani hai
shopkeeper: Exide laga du ??
.
.
Santa: ek-side kyu be, jab paise pure de raha hun to dono side laga k de
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
sardar apna mobile
Qabristan main dafna raha tha
.
Major Rohail:
Sardar G Ye kya kar rahe ho?
....
Sardar:
Yaar dukan wale ne kha hai ke
Mobile "DEAD" ho gaya hai..
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Phool wala: Sahab ye phol apni girl frnd k liye lejyen
Admi: meri koi girl frnd nhn
Phol wala: phr apni mengatar k lia lejyen
Admi: meri koi mengatar bi nhn
Phol wala: phr apni biwi k lia lejyen
Admi: meri koi biwi b nhn
Phol wala: Ae dunya k khush qismat insan! Meri taraf se yeh phool Muft leja.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Paise wala aadmi:” aaj mere paas
14 cars
18 dukaan
4 Bangle hain..
Tumhare paas kya hai ??
.
.
.
.
.
.
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Gharib aadmi:” mere paas 1 beta
hai,
jiski girlfriend teri beti hai…:P:P
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Sardarji to others:
Did anyone lose money wrapped in a rubber band?
One said, Yes I did
Sardar: Well, it's your lucky day,
I found the rubberband!
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Titanic Ke Sath Santa Bhi Dub Raha Tha,
Our Has Bhi Raha Tha.
Banta: Oye Kyu Hass Raha Hai?
Santa: Shukr hai maine return ticket nahi kharida.
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status.
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Aik Pathan AdMi SamAndAr Me Dob GayA,Is Ne DUA ki YA ALLAH Mujhe NikAL De Me Teri Rah Me Aik ChAwAL Ki Degh Don Ga,To Aik LEHAR ne Isko BahAr NikAL DiyA,Is Ne BahAr a kAr KahA: KON SI DEGH?
ForAn 1 LEHAR Aai Or Isko WAPIS le Gai,
TO is ne Kaha: YA ALLAH meNe TO ye PUCHA thA KON si Deg MITHEE ya NAMKIN
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Ek aadmi bada dukhi tha!
Ek dost ne uss se poocha, “Kyu, tension mein ho.”
Aadmi: Yaar ek dost ko plastic surgery ke liye 2 lakh rupeey diye thay, ab saale ko peehchan nahi pa raha hoon
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man,"I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample." The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells: "WHAT?" "What did he say? What's he want?"His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."
by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Gayon mein aik shakhs ka inteqaal ho gia aik saheb tazyat kay liye in kay betay kay pas gaye aur poocha marhoom ko kia bimari thi.
Betay nay jawab mein kaha burhapa khood aik bimari hai.
Woh saheb bolay: Waqai hamaray mohallay mein bhi teen char bachay isi bimari mein maray hain.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Aik sabzi farosh kay han bachah paida hua. Parosi waghira dekhnay kay liye aaye huye the.
Aik khatoon nay pucha: bhayi saheb bacha kaisa hai?
Sabzi farosh nay kaha: bilkul taza hai.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)