Animal; 711 Jokes

appinment

John called his doctor’s office for an appointment.

I’m sorry, said the receptionist, We can’t fit you in for at least two weeks.

But I could be dead by then!

No problem. If your wife lets us know, we’ll cancel the appointment.

by Zia Rasool (few years ago!)
problm

A man walks into a doctor’s office. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.

What’s the matter with me? he asks the doctor.

The doctor replies, You’re not eating properly.

by Zia Rasool (few years ago!)
solution

Quiz: What do you call one lawyer thrown off a bridge into a river?
Ans: Pollution.

Quiz: What do you call all the lawyers thrown off a bridge?
Ans: Solution

by Zia Rasool (few years ago!)
Naqli note

Pthan Naqli note le kr surf lane shop pe gya.
Shopkepr:
is me Quaid-e-Azam k sr pe Topi nhi hai.
Pthan:
wo meli ho gai hai usi k liey to surf leney aya hun.

by Zia Rasool (few years ago!)
Pathan

Man: Radio or Akhbar me kya farq hai?
Pathan (bohat sochny k bad): Daikh mera bhai, baat hai samjhny wali, ab radio me Aap rotiyan tou nai la skty na.;-)

by Zia Rasool (few years ago!)
putar nhi labde

Chuhi chuhe se-Tu mere lyi jaan de sakda a?
Chuha-kade nhi?
chuhi-kyon?
chuha-Sadi maa nu put nhi labne tenu yaar bathere......

by Sajjad Qureshi (few years ago!)
khana gobar jaisa

Husbend: ye kesa khana banaya hai tum ny bikul gober jaisa . . . . .
Wife: Toba hai !!! is admi ny tu har cheez chakhi hoi hai

by Sajjad Qureshi (few years ago!)
MURGA: I love u jaan

MURGA: I love u jaan me
tumhare liye kuch b kr sakta hon.

MURGI: O really ?

MURGA: Haan ,

MURGI: Chal phir aaj anda tu de de meri
tabiyat theek ni,...

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Murgi ne india pakistan border

Murgi ne india pakistan border par 1 Anda diya. Dono desh
1 ande k liye larrne lage,

Faisla hua jo dusre desh ki zyada ladkiyo ko

kiss karega anda uska hoga,
Indians ne 20,000 pakistani Ladkiyo ko kiss kiya,

Pakistani excited ho kar bole:= Ab humari bari hai.

Indians:= Chhoro yaar Anda tum hi rakh lo..

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Mor(Peacock) Morni ko

Mor(Peacock) Morni ko
kiss karne laga.

Morni use rok k idhar
udhar dekhnelagi,

Mor: Kya hua Janu?

Morni : Dekh rahi hu aas
pass Discovry wale to
nahi hai,

Saale MMS bana lete hai..

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Aaj Dua Qubool Ho Hi Gayi

Ek Pinjre Mein Kuch Tote Ek Toti Ko Chhed Rahe The.

Jabki Dusre Pinjre Mein Ek Tota Pooja Aur Dusra Tota Namaz Padh Raha Tha.

Malik Ne Socha: “Kitne Nek Tote Hain, Inke Pinjre Mein Toti Safe Rahegi”

Usne Toti Ko Nek Toton Ke Pinjre Mein Daal Diya.

To Pooja Karne Wala Tota Namaz Padhne Wale Tote Se Bola

Tota: “Utho Khan Sahab Dua Qubool Ho Gayi“

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Ant and Elephant

An ant and an elephant got married, despite the best advice of their friends.

After the first night of honeymoon, the elephant suffered a heart attack and died.

"It's so bad.," said the ant, "One night of emotions, and now I get to spend the rest of my life digging a grave."

by Sohaib Tariq (few years ago!)
Kiya Waqt Aa Gaya Hay Insaan Pay Source

Aik kutta doosray se:

Oye aaj kal jahan rush ho wahan se nikal jaya kr.

Doosra: Kyon?

Pehla: Salay, agr dhamaka hogya tu insanon ki moat maray ga.

by Sohaib Tariq (few years ago!)
Chor Do Nasha

Ek Cheeta Cigarette ka sutta lagane hi wala tha ki achanak ek chuha wahan aya aur bola

bhai chor do nasha, ao mere sath,dekho ye jungle kitna khubsurt hai.

Cheeta choohe k sath chal dia
Aage 1 hathi cocaine pi rha tha, chooha
Phir bola,

bhai chor do nasha,ao mere sath,dekho ye jungle kitna khubsurt hai.

Hathi b sth chal dia

Age sher whisky pene ki tyari kr rha tha,choohe ne use b woi kaha

Sher ne glas side pr rakha aur chohe ko 5-6 thappar mare

Hathi bola are kyu mar rahe ho is bechare ko?

Sher bola, Is kamine ne pichli bar b afeem kha kar mujhe 3 ghante jungle me aise hi ghumaya tha.......

by Sohaib Tariq (few years ago!)
Ek Pinjra

Ek Pinjre Mein Kuch Tote Ek Toti Ko Chhed Rahe The.
Jabki Dusre Pinjre Mein Ek Tota Pooja Aur Dusra Tota Namaz Padh Raha Tha.

Malik Ne Socha: “Kitne Nek Tote Hain, Inke Pinjre Mein Toti Safe Rahegi”

Usne Toti Ko Nek Toton Ke Pinjre Mein Daal Diya.

To Pooja Karne Wala Tota Namaz Padhne Wale Tote Se Bola

Tota: “Utho Khan Sahab Dua Qubool Ho Gayi“

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)

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