Santa: Itne Kam Marks?

Santa: Itne Kam Marks?

Do Thappad Marne Chahiye.
Pappu: Haan Papa, Chalo Maine Us

Saale Master Ka Ghar Bhi Dekh Rakha Hai…

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 821 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

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ek aadmi ne

Sardar: Raat mujhe ek aadmi ne chaku dikhakar loot liya. Friend:Lekin tere pas to hamesha Gun hoti hai. Sardar:Wo maine chupa di thi, warna wo bhi chori ho jati.

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
A Doctor Is Complaining To A Mechanic

A doctor is talking to a car mechanic, "Your fee is several times more per hour then we get paid for medical care."

"Yeah, but you see, doc, you have always the same model, it hasn't changed since Adam; but we have to keep up to date with new models coming every month."

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Husband and Wife

Wife: Ji apko mujhme kya acha lagta hai meri samajhdari ya meri beauty..

Husband: Mujhe to ye tumhari Mazak karne ki aadat bahut achi lagti hai..

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PATHAN Scientist

PATHAN Scientist Ne Tajarbe Mein Makkhi Ke Par Kaat Ker Kaha:

Urr Ja

Makkhi Nahi Urri

PATHAN Bola: Is Tajarbe Se Sabit Hua Ke Makkhi Ke Par Kaatne Se Makkhi

Sun Nahi Sakti.

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Khan sab yha se Airport Kon se bus jae ge

Major Rohail:
Khan sab yha se Airport
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Khan:
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by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Vasectomy Jokes

As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision

VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"

"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."

"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"

"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation

Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill

While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.

Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up

Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher. Class Ka Group Photo

Teacher. Class Ka Group Photo Dikhatey Huye:

"Jub Tum Baray Ho Jao Ge Tou Herat Se Photo Ko Dekho Ge Aur Kaho Ge Ke:

Yeh Nida Hai Jo Amarica Chali Gai.
...
Yeh Sana Hai Jo Londan Chali Gai.

Yeh Pappu Hai Jo Wahin ka Wahin Hai".

Pappu Jal Kar Bola:

"Aur Yeh Humari Teacher Hain Jin Ka Inteqal Ho Chuka Hai"

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
train names

Ager trains k naam Pakistani Actresses k naam pe hotey tou khabrain aisi hotin: Aaj Reema overload ho kr gai!! Saima k neechay aa k aik banda halaak!! Accident main Shahida Minni ki pichli bogi tabbah!! Tez raftaari ki wja se LAILA patri se uter gai!! Meera pe charhne waalon ki tadaad main izafa!! Nirma chalte chalte band ho gai!! Khushbu ki body change karne ka faisla!! Nargis per ghair qanooni tor per charhey huay 7 afraad ko saza!! 

by Mohammad Ali (few years ago!)
Jawab Phool Se Do

Jab tumhe koi thappar bhi maray

to uska jawab phool se do

Magar phool qabrustan ja kar he dena :P

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
Laloo Was Coming Out Of The Airport

Once Laloo Was Coming Out Of The Airport.
As There Was A Huge Rush,
The Security Guard Told Laloo:
“WAIT PLEASE”,

For Which Laloo Replied:
“85 Kgs” And Moved On…

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
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