Maths Teacher Ne Pappu Se
Maths Teacher Ne Pappu Se Pucha.
Teacher: “Pappu Batao, Tumahre Pass 8 Apples Hai Unko 6 Ladko Mein Kaisi Bantoge?”
Pappu Ne Kuch Socha, Dimag Mein Hisab Lagaya Aur Bola.
Pappu: “Madam Kahe Ko Itni Tension Leni Hai, Juice Bana Ke De Do Na.“
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 920 views
Similar Jokes
An old woman is going up in a lift in a very Lavish department store when a young, beautiful woman gets in, smelling of expensive scent. She turns to the old woman and says arrogantly "Romance by Ralph Lauren, £100 a bottle."
Then another young woman gets in the lift, She also turns to the old woman and says snootily "Chanel No 5, £150 a bottle."
A few floors later, the old woman has reached her destination. As she gets out, she looks both woman in the eye, then turns round, bends over and farts, saying "Broccoli, 25p a pound."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision
VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"
"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation
Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill
While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.
Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up
Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Pathan Galti Se News Paper Ka Sub-Editor Ban
Gia. Usne Aik Khabar Ki Headline Ye Di:
"BIWI MEIN DHAMAKA...!"
Cheif Editor: Yeh Tum Ne Headline Kia Di Hai?
Pathan: Sir Mene Khabar Ko Asan Alfaz Mein Likha
Hai.
Cheif Editor: Acha Asal Khabar Kia Thi?
Pathan: "MIAAN WALI MEIN DHAMAKA"
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa ( to his son ) : Itne km marks? do thappad marne chayiye.......!
Santa's son : Haan papa.. chalo...mene us master ka ghr dekha hai.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A chicken crossed the road and met James Bond,
'What's your name?'
asked the chicken,
'Bond, James Bond.
Whats yours?',
'Ken, Chick Ken.'
by Muhammad Zeeshan (few years ago!)
On a flight to Florida, I was preparing my notes for one of the parent-education seminars I conduct as an educational psychologist.
The elderly woman sitting next to me explained that she was returning to Miami after having spent two weeks visiting her six children, 18 grandchildren and ten great-grandchildren in Boston.
Then she inquired what I did for a living.
I told her, fully expecting her to question me for free professional advice.
Instead she sat back, picked up a magazine and said, "If there's anything you want to know, just ask me."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Ek lady apne boyfriend ke sath ghum rahi thi ke itne me uska husband aa gaya or bf ko marne laga
Lady- Maar gadhe ko, apni biwi ko to gumata nahi dusron ki biwi ghumane le aate hai.
( itne me bf ko josh aaya or wo hsbnd ko marne laga )
lady- maar sale ko, na khud ghumane le jata hai na kisi or ko ghumane deta hai. :)
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Sarar: Light nai to kambakhat fan to chala do,
Sardani: aakhir sardar he to hai na
aqal hai hi nai
Fan chala dia to mombati bhojh jay gi
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Toy Train se khel rha
tha
aur Bar-Bar bol rha tha,
"Jis HARAMI ko chadna
hai chad jao, Jis
KAMINE ne utarna hai
utr jao..."
.
.
.
Uske BAAP ne uski train
rok k 1 zor se
thappad laga diya...
.
.
Bachha thodi der ro k
chup ho gaya aurfir
shuru ho gaya,
.
.
"Jis HARAMI ko chadna
hai chad jao, Jis
KAMINE ne utrna hai utr
jao ."
.
.
Pehle hi kisi KUTTE ki
wajah seTrain 10
min
late ho gayi hai..
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire?”
Millionaire: “I owe everything to my wife.”
Interviewer: “Wow, she must be some woman.
Interviewer: “What were you before you married her?”
Millionaire: “A Billionaire”
by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)