Santa Is Not Sleeping With His Wife!
Santa Is Not Sleeping With His Wife! These Days
Guess Why?
Because Somebody Had Told Him That It Is Wrong To Sleep With Married Women.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 987 views
Similar Jokes
Pathan: oye teray chotay bhai ki moonchain hen or teri nahi hen?
Aisa kiun?
2nd Pathan: Is main kiun wali kya bat he?
Wo Abu pe gya he or me ammi pe.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision
VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"
"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation
Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill
While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.
Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up
Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
America mein Light gayi to...
Power Office mein phone karte hain!
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JAPAN Me gayi to...
Fuse check karte hain!
.
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Par...
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INDIA mein gayi to...
Padosi ka ghar dekhte hain..
Sabki gayi hai…
Ya apni he khraab huyi hai.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Bv:me driver ko nokri se nikal rahi hun,aj me dusri bar marte marte bchi hun.
Shohar:(khushi se)begum aik aur mauqa use de do
by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
Be sure that you go straight home.
I can't; I live just round the corner!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A boy was driving a car on a Highway. A girl on scooty overtook him.
Boy shouted, “Buffalo”
Girl turned back & shouted, “Pig, donkey, Monkey, Stupid boy”
Suddenly she met with an accident. She was hit by a buffalo crossing the road.
MORAL: “Girls never understand what a boy wants to say''
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
BF:Mai Tumhara Mobile Dekh Sakta Hu
GF:Ha Janu Q Nai Just A Minute
Delte Delete Delte
Ya Lo Janu Dekh Lo Tumha To Mujpe Trust Hi Nai
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
2 pathan masjid mai namaz parhne aye.
First pathan: chalo shukar hai namaz nahi nikli,Warna.
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
1 admi 2 Cigarettes pee raha tha
BV: 2 Cigarette Q pee rahe ho?
Admi: dost ki yad aa rahi hy, 1 meri aur 1 mere dost ki
kuch din baad admi 1 Cigarette pee raha tha.
BV: Dost ko bhool gaye kya?
Admi: Nhi bewaqoof, mene Cigarette peena chorr di hy ab sirf dost ki pee raha hon.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Africa kai aik jungle mai aik bohot hi ala nasal ka hiran (deer) ghayab hogaya, Government nai dusray countries ki police ko bulwaya investigation kai liya.
FBI: 4 months ki mahnat kai baad bhi FBI ko kuch na mila aur woh baghair hiran (deer) kai wapis agai.
Indian Police: 5 months ki pahnai ka baad bhi kuch hasil na kar pai aur khali haat hi agai.
Pakistani Police: 20 minute ki mahnai kai baad hi wapis agai aur sath mai aik hati (elephant) lai kar agai aur elephant kah raha tha kai “ Han Han mai hi hiran hon Han Han mai hi hiran hon”
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)