Marriage tip
Marriage tip :
When you want to get your Wife's Attention :
"just look Comfortable
and Happy...!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 869 views
Similar Jokes
*Wife was teaching Grammar*
Wife: "I am Beautiful",
Which tense is this?
Santa : Past tense!!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision
VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"
"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation
Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill
While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.
Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up
Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Girl:Kya kr rahe ho
Boy:Makhiya mar rha hu
G:Kitni mari
B:3 male 2 female
...
G:Kese pata?
B:3 Beer bottle pe the aur 2 Phone se chipki thi.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Usama asked Kajol,”how’s ur life?”
She replied,”kabhi khushi kabhi ghum.”
Then Kajol asked Usama,”what abt U?” He
replied,”kabhi BUSH kabhi BOMB.”
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan : Bachpan me agar Maa ki baat
suni hoti to Aaj ye Din nahi dekhna parta.
Judge : Kiya kehti thi Maa?
Pathan : Jab baat hi nahi suni to
kese bataun?...:-0
by @irha@ (few years ago!)
Single is not a status
It is a word that best describes a
person who is strong enough
to live and enjoy life without
depending on others !!
by @irha@ (few years ago!)
Santa: mere frnd ne chupke se mere mbl se meri GF ka number le liya….
Banta: fir kya huya???
Santa: bewakoof kal se aapni he behen ko romantic MSG vej raha hai………!!!!;-):-P:-D
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
1 sardar airhostess se,
“Aapki shakal meri biwi si bohut milti hai!”
Hostess ne zordar thappar us k mun pe mara..
sardar forun bola:”Adat bhi bohut milti hai”
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Santa: What is another Difference between a Mosquito and a Fly?
Banta: A Fly can fly but a Mosquito cannot mosquito. :P
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Ak admi bchay sy. . . . . . . . .
“kia tum rat ko dua parh kr soo ty ho????
Bcha: Nahe, mgr meri ma dua parh k sote ha….
Admi:wo kia prte ha???”
Bcha:”Ya Allah tera shukar ha k muna soo gaya. . .
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)