hamaari shaadi nahi ho paayegi
Boyfriend: Darling mein kal tumhaare ghar gaya tha but lagta hai
hamaari shaadi nahi ho paayegi
Girlfriend: Oh no kyun? papa se mile they kya ?
kya boley woh.
Boyfriend: Nahi, tumhaari behan se milaa tha..
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 860 views
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Ans. Frog
Why?
Because Frog is MAINDUCK.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Im not feeling well..
Husband: Ohhoo I was thinking to go for a dinner!!
Wife: I was joking dear..
Husband: Me too, Chal uth rotti bana shabas.
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision
VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"
"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation
Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill
While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.
Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up
Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
1 Admi Teliscope Se Asman Me Dekh Raha Tha.1 Sardar Use Dhyan Se Dekh Raha Tha Tabhi 1 Tara Tuta.Sardar:Wah Boss Kya Nishana Lagaya.!!
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Boss nokar se: tum kisi kaam se jate ho to 2,3
ghantay tak wapis q nh aate
nokar: aap ne hi to kya tha k bijli k tarha jao or
bijli ke tarha aao
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Marriage is a three ring circus: an engagement ring, a wedding ring, and suffering.
by khalid hussain (few years ago!)
Jeeto: yelled at Santa! U're gonna b really sorry!
I'm going to LEAVE you!
Santa: Make up ur mind! Which one is it gonna be?
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Teacher is explaining to the student,
'if you see someone sinking in the water, you should pull his hair to save him from the water. It will be easy for you.'
Student: but sir, if it happens to you, we shouldn’t help you.
Teacher: why?
Student: because you don’t have any hair.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Manager: Sorry, but I can't give u a job. I don't have any more work.
Santa: That's all right, sir. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You see, I won't ask you to give me work anyway!!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
interviewer to santa : tumhari sabse badi shakti kya hai?
santa : ji meri biwi.
interviewer : aur sab se bdi kamzori?
santa : ji dusre ki BIWI.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)