Food One-liners
The snack bar next door to an atom smasher was called "The Fission Chips."
On April Fools Day, a mother put a fire cracker under the pancakes. She blew her stack.
A new chef from India was fired a week after starting the job. He keep favoring curry.
A couple of kids tried using pickles for a Ping-Pong game. They had the volley of the Dills.
The four food groups: Fast, Frozen, Instant, and Chocolate.
A friend got some vinegar in his ear, now he suffers from pickled hearing.
Overweight is something that just sort of snacks up on you.
Sign in restaurant window: "Eat now - Pay waiter."
I thought you were trying to get into shape?
I am. The shape I've selected is a triangle.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 1155 views
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AADMI APNE BETE SE-BETA KABHI SHARAB MAT PEENA,, WARNA YE JO 2 AADMI JA RAHE HAI NA WO 4 DIKHENGE....
BETA-MGR PAPA,WO TO 1 AADMI HI HAI....
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
?1 admi k 4 bache thayGovt ne elan kia k jis k 5 bache honge usy Rs.20000 mahana dia jae ga Admi ne bv ko kaha k mera 1 Beta meri girl frnd se b he me wo b lekr ata hun Jab admi wapis ghar aya to Apny 2 bache Kam thay Admi: 2 kahan gaiy.BV: Jis k thy wo le gya, tum ne akelay to elan nahi suna na.!!
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The principal had a problem with some girls who were starting to use lipstick. When applying it in the bathroom they would blot their lips on the mirrors, leaving lip prints.
Before it got out of hand, he thought of a way to stop it. One day he gathered together all the girls who wore lipstick. He then took them into the bathroom and lectured about how hard it was to clean the lipstick off the mirrors. The principle then asked the custodian, who was present, to demonstrate.
The custodian took a long handled brush, dipped it into the toilet and vigorously rubbed the lipstick off the mirror.
From that day forward, the mirrors stayed lipstick free.
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Bank manager asks Sardar in an interview: "What is cyclone"
Sardar: "It is the loan given to purchase a cycle"
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Love Before Marriage:
Janu!!! Tum nahi to Main nahi,...
Main nahi to Tum nahi,,,
Love After Marriage:
Baighairtaa.... Aaj Tu nahi ya Main nahi...
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together.
Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."
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1st man:jail ko urdu me hawalaat kiun kehte hain?
2nd man:kiun k jail me khane ko sirf hawa aur laat hi milte hain.
by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
Nirmal baba akhirkar dukhi hokar shiv ji k pas gaye
bole sare bhakt piche pade h,
shiv-beta kbhi jail gye ho.
Baba-nhi.
Shiv ji-jail hokar aao. Kripa aani suru ho jyegi.
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Pathan aur Sardar paani peenay gai, glass ulta
para hua tha
Sardar: Khan Sahab iska to moo hi band hai.
Pathan: Haan yar yeh to neechay se b toota hua
hai…
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
A kid went 2school 4the first time.Teacher told her ifu had 2 go 2 Toilet,raise ur index finger.Kid is puzzled n asks,Thats going 2 stop it?
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)