A Barrage Of Obama Jokes

Q: Have you heard about McDonald's' new Obama Value Meal?
A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it.
~Conan O'Brien

America needs Obama-care like Nancy Pelosi needs a Halloween mask.
~Jay Leno

Q: What does Barack Obama call lunch with a convicted felon?
A: A fund raiser.
~Jay Leno

The liberals are asking us to give Obama time. We agree... and think 25 to life would be appropriate.
~Jay Leno (we love Jay)

Q: What's the difference between Obama and his dog, Bo?
A: Bo has papers.
~Jimmy Kimmel

Q: If Nancy Pelosi and Obama were on a boat in the middle of the ocean and it started to sink, who would be saved?
A: America!
~Jimmy Fallon

After a quick meet-and-greet with King Abdullah, Obama was off to Israel, where he made a quick stop at the manger in Bethlehem where he was born. ~Jon Stewart

Q: What's the difference between Obama's cabinet and a penitentiary?
A: One is filled with tax evaders, blackmailers, and threats to society. The other is for housing prisoners.
~David Letterman

Q: What was the most positive result of the "Cash for Clunkers" program?
A: It took 95% of the Obama bumper stickers off the road.
~David Letterman (Dave's not bad either)

Police in Texas arrested a man who was using the alias 'Barack Obama' while trying to steal money from 35 ATMs. They could tell something was up when a guy named Barack Obama was trying to take money from banks instead of giving it to them. ~Jimmy Fallon

You know, it's hard to believe President Obama has now been in office for a year. Isn't that amazing? It's a year. And you know, it's incredible. He took something that was in terrible, terrible shape, and he brought it back from the brink of disaster: The Republican party. ~Jay Leno

President Obama should get a big refund this year because he has a lot of dependents. AIG, Citibank, Morgan Stanley - all dependents.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 909 views
(Not Rated Yet)
 

Similar Jokes

Allah Ke Naam Pe Kuch Dedo

Faqeer: ALLAH k Nam pr kuch dedo

Ghar se larki boli kuch nahi hai muaf karo..

FAQEER: Chalo Apna Number hi day do
Baba Dua b kary ga aur msg b?

by shaukat (few years ago!)
Jab Main Tum Par Ghusa Karta Hoon

Malik Nokar Sey:
Jab Main Tum Par Ghusa Karta Hoon,

To Tum Apna Ghusa Kis Pe Nikalte Ho?

Nokar: Toilet Saf Kar K,

Malik: Kaise Saf Karte Ho…?
Nokar:
Ap K Tooth Brush Se..

by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)
2 bomb mile

2 PATHANO ko 2 bomb mile.

1st pathan: Chal police ko de atay hain

2nd pathan: Agr koi bomb raste may phat gia to?

1st pathan:Jhoot bol denge k ek hi mila tha.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
1ST PATHAN

1ST PATHAN:
Oye Agar Raat Ko Neend Na Aaye
Tu Kya Kiya Jaye..?

2ND PATHAN:
0 Yara Neend Ka Intzar
Karne Se Tu Behtar Hai
Aadmi So Jaye.

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
nekah fees

Nikah K bad.
Admi:Fees?
Molvi:bv ki khubsurti K mutabiq de do!
Admi ne10 rupay de diye
Achanak hawa se Larki ka ghonghat uth gya
Molvi:Baqaya to Le Lo bhai.

by Abdul Sami (few years ago!)
Mian Biwi mei jhagra ho raha tha

Mian Biwi mei jhagra ho raha tha. Aakhir Shohar bola:

Begum ye masla humein Larai se nahi Aqal se hal karna chahye!
Biwi:

Haan haan.!!
Ta'kay tum Jeet jao?

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Faqir:10rs dedo chai peyonga

Faqir:10rs dedo chai peyonga Seth:chai to 5 ki
hai.....Faqir: Girl friend ko b pelaonga.....Seth:
Faqiro ne b Grl Friend banalin.....Faqir:nahi saab
Girl Friend na Faqir bana dia ha

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Daddy have you ever been

Son : Daddy, have you ever been to Egypt? Father : No. Why do you ask that? Son : Well, where did you get mummy then?

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Pathan 2 Sardar:

Pathan 2 Sardar:
Maine Aisa Mashroob Banaya Hai
Jise Peete He Insan Such Bolne Lagta Hai.
Tum Pee Kar Dekho.
Sardar (Mashroob Pee Kar):
Aakh Thoo, Yeh To Tail Hai.
Pathan: Dekha Tumne Such Bola,
Yeh Waqai Tail Hai.

by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Looking at the clock

Teacher: Will you stop looking at the clock at the wall and pay attention?

Pupil: Time will pass, but will you?

by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
  • Page 1 of 1
  • 1

Most Viewed Jokes

shadi pr rukhsati k waqt

Golu-mere bete ka credit card

What's the difference

Insan ko Beemar kar Dainay w..

Mareez Muje ajeeb se Bimari ..

Sard Fizaaa

Ijazat

Delivery ke waqt

Google Ziyada Acha Hai Ya Ya..

Police officer attempts to s..

Existing Users Login
User ID
Password
 
 
Join Now / Forgot Password

also you can..
Login with Facebook