Presents in the past
Grandfather:
“When I was your age, all I’ve got for Christmas
was an apple and a blackberry.
Boy:
“WHAT! A LAPTOP AND A MOBILE?!”
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!) / 884 views
Similar Jokes
Teacher: Do you have trouble making decisions?
Student: Well...yes and no.
by Abdul Latif (few years ago!)
Santa mango juice ka glaas le kar baitha tha
Banta aaya aur fataak se juice pee gaya.
Santa – Meri to yaar kismat hi kharab hai. Beta fail ho gaya,
biwi dost ke saath bhag gayi, ghar me chori ho gayi, nalke me
paani nahi, ghar me light nahi.
Aab juice me zehar daal ke peene ko rakha tha
aur wo bhi tu pee gaya saale!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Banta : Dekh Santa Ek Saanp,Teri Biwi Ko Kaat Raha Hai.,Santa :D ar Mat Yaar.Vo Kaat Nhi Raha,Vo To Zehar Bharwane Aaya Hoga
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Barnum & Bailey was transferring the circus from one town to another. The elephants were connected trunk to tail. They came along a railroad crossing and as the elephants were halfway across the tracks, a train came along and killed two of them.
Shortly thereafter, B&M Railroad received an invoice from Barnum and Bailey for $10,000. B&M immediately called Barnum & Bailey and requested an explanation for the charge, writing, "What is the cost of a new elephant?"
Barnum & Bailey responded, "$1,000 each."
B&M responded, "But, we only killed two of them!"
Barnum & Bailey said, "Yes, but you pulled the assholes out of eight others."
by khalid hussain (few years ago!)
No, Windows is not a virus. Here's what viruses do:
1.They replicate quickly - okay, Windows does that.
2.Viruses use up valuable system resources, slowing down the system as they do so - okay, Windows does that.
3.Viruses will, from time to time, trash your hard disk - okay, Windows does that too.
4.Viruses are usually carried, unknown to the user, along with valuable programs and systems. - Sigh.. Windows does that, too.
5.Viruses will occasionally make the user suspect their system is too slow (see 2) and the user will buy new hardware. - Yup, Windows does that, too.
Until now it seems Windows is a virus but there are fundamental differences: Viruses are well supported by their authors, are running on most systems, their program code is fast, compact and efficient and they tend to become more sophisticated as they mature.
So Windows is not a virus.
It's a bug.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Sardar’s Theory
Moon Is More Important Than Sun Coz It Gives Light At Nite
When Lite Is Needed
But Sun Gives Light
During Daytime When Light Is Not Needed.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Example Of Chor Ki Daadi Mein Tinka
Pappu Apni Wife Se – Suno ghar ka sara saman
chupa do…. Mera ek dost aa raha hai….
Wife – Aisa kyun, Woh chura lenge kya….
Pappu - Arey nahi yaar pehchan lega…
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Duniya k 2 intehai mushkil kam.
1) Apna idea kisi aur k zehen me fit krna.
2) Kisi aur ka paisa apni jaib me muntkil krna.
Jo pehlay me kamyab hota hai, usay Teacher kehtay hen. Jo doosray mai kamyab hota hai, usay Buisness man kehtay hen. Aur jo dono me kamyab ho usay…. BIWI kehtay hen
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Lady to Doctor: Mujhe Gas ki
problem hai par achhi baat ye hai ki meri gas me na BadBu aati hai na Awaaz.
Aap k clinic me bhi 20 dafa gas chhod chuki hu par kisi ko pata nahi chala..
Doctor: "Ye Dawa lijiye aur 1 week baad aayiye" .(1 week baad) .
Old Lady:"Aap ne mujhe kya dawa de di? Meri gas me ab bhi aawaz nahi aa rahi par
bahut Zehrili Badbu aa rahi hai" .
Doctor:"Good..! Aapki Naak theek ho gayi hai Ab hum aap k KAAN ka ilaaj karenge....
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Dost tere girl friend ka phone aya tha
Keh reahe the koi pathar se na mare meray dewane ko
Bomb ka zamana hay ura do sale ko
by Mazhar Khan (few years ago!)