A Great Fruit Cake Recipie
You'll need the following: a cup of water, a cup of sugar, four large eggs, two cups of dried fruit, a teaspoon of baking soda, a teaspoon of salt, a cup of brown sugar, lemon juice, nuts, and a bottle of whisky.
Sample the whisky to check for quality.
Take a large bowl. Check the whisky again. To be sure it is the highest quality, pour one level cup and drink. Repeat. Turn on the electric mixer, beat one cup of butter in a large fluffy bowl. Add one teaspoon of sugar and beat again.
Make sure the whisky is still okay. Cry another tup. Turn off the mixer. Break two leggs and add to the bowl and chuck in the cup of dried fruit. Mix on the turner. If the fried druit gets stuck in the beaterers pry it loose with a drewscriver.
Sample the whisky to check for tonsisticity. Next, sift two cups of salt. Or something. Who cares? Check the whisky. Now sift the lemon juice and strain your nuts. Add one table. Spoon. Of sugar or something. Whatever you can find.
Grease the oven. Turn the cake tin to 350 degrees. Don't forget to beat off the turner. Throw the bowl out of the window, check the whisky again and go to bed.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 939 views
Similar Jokes
Friend: Tumhare Abbu Kitne Saal K Hain?
Pathan: Jitne Saal Ke Hum Hai.
Friend: Wo Kse?
Pathan: O Yara Jis Din Hum Paida Hua, Usi Din To Wo Abbu Bana!;-)
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Boy to Friend: I'm sorry, I won't be able to go out after school. I promised Dad that I would stay in and help him with my homework.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Interviewer
Asked Candidate:
"How Many Senses Does
A Man Have?"
Candidate Replied:
....
"Five, Sir!!"
Interviewer:
"Sorry Kid, There Is A 6th
Sense Also & That's
Common Sense..
Which You Don't Seem To
Have."
Candidate:
"Sir, There Is 7th Sense
Also..
That's Non-Sense Which
You Are Talking.......
by Tanveer Hussain (few years ago!)
Q: Why does a cement wall break to pieces when a blonde hits it with their head?
A: The smartest one gives up first.
by Kamran (few years ago!)
Qatil: Try karo ke umar qaid ho jaye maga saza-e-mot na hojay
.
Pathan Lawyer: Tum fikar mat karo
.
After Case
Qatil: Kya howa?
Pathan: Boht mushkil se umar qaid howi, warna adalat tu reha kar rahi thir
by Tayyab Mughal (few years ago!)
Ek Ladke Ko Girls Hostel Mein Naukri Mil Gayi.
Do Mahine Baad Hostel Ki
Warden Ne Use Bulakar Kaha.
Warden: “Tum Apni Salary Nahi Lene Aaye?”
Ladka Chikhte Hue Bola: “Kyaaaaaa?, Salary Bhi Milegi?
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Ques: What is common in Air and Students?
.
Answer: Both turn the pages of book without reading
by Haris abbas Qureshi (few years ago!)
Rita: AcHanak hi tum bacHat krne lagi Ho.
Gita: Ha yaHi mere pati ki akHari kwaHis tHi, dubte samay ve yaHi keH raHe tHe "BACHAO BACHAO"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
*Love b4 Marriage*
Janu...tum nahe to mei nahe,
mei nahe to tum nahe...
*Love after Marriage*
"baghairta"...Aj tu nahe ya me nahe
by @irha@ (few years ago!)
Ek Pathan ki Chappal kisi ne Chura li,
Woh Seedha Qabristan Pohancha Aur Wahan Baith kar Kehne laga:
Chor ko Kaha Dhonda Jaye 1 na 1 Din to Yahan Aayega na.
by Abdul Hannan (few years ago!)