Biwi Ke Liya Kya Kya Nahi Karna Padta
Ek Chor Chori Karke Pakda Gaya. Chor Ko Police Station Le Jakar Puchha Gaya.
Police Inspector: “Tum Ek Hi Dukan Mein Teen Baar Chori Karne Kyon Gaye?”
Chor: “Sir, Chori To Maine
Pehali Baar Mein Hi Apni Patni Ke Liye Ek Dress Churakar Kar Li Thi, Baki Do Baar To Mujhe Sirf Use Badalne Ke Liye Jana Pada“
by Pak101.com (few years ago!) / 762 views
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Har khushi teri taraf mod dun,
tere lye chand tare tak tor dun,
khushiun k darwaze tere lye khol dun,
itna kafi hai ya 2,4 jhoot aur bi bol dun
by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
Ek gora aadmi tha. Jab uska ladka paida hua toh woh kala tha.
Tabhi woh apni patni ke paas jata hai aur poochta hai, “Yaar main bhi gora tha tum bhi gori thi to bachcha kaise kala paida ho gaya”
Aur phir uski biwi ne jawab diya, “Darling main bhi hot tum bhi hot sayad bachcha jal gaya hoga.”
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phansi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police: Kyon hasn rahe ho?
Sardar: Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hun.
by hearthackervsgirls (few years ago!)
Doctor: What seems to be the trouble?
Patient: Doctor, I keep getting the feeling that nobody can hear what I say.
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by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Tamam
Pakistani Bhaiyon Aur Unki Behnon
Se Appeal Hai. Ke Please Aamir Khan
ki New Movie “3 IDIOTS” Na Dekhen.
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In HARYANA:Mam-Hanuman kiska chora tha?
Stdnt-Jaat ka
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by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: “I killed a person”
convert this sentence into future tense.
Sardar: The future tense is “u will go to jail”.
by tanveer hussain (few years ago!)
Shareef larkiaon aur dianasour me common kia hai?
Saf zahair hai donon is dunia me nai rahe hain.
by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
1st man:jail ko urdu me hawalaat kiun kehte hain?
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by Sabir shah (few years ago!)
As I sit here I'm contemplating having a vasectomy, you know... the "removing" of your manhood. You know, it looks like a relatively simple procedure, heck I even asked if they had a do-it-yourself kit (true story). Afterall, $950 bucks for a 15 minute snip-snip is kinda excessive. At any rate, I won't be cutting on my balls anytime soon - but I do have some vasectomy jokes (more of a timeline of events) if you're in the same mood I am. We'll call him "Bill" and this is his story.
It's A Family Decision
VasectomyBill was at his family doctor for his annual physical exam. His doctor returned, filling out a bunch of stuff on his chart, and boasted "Your checkup went well, everything looks to be in order. Is there anything that you'd like to ask me?"
"Well," Bill mumbles, "Actually, I was thinking about getting a vasectomy."
"That's a pretty big decision. Have you talked this over with your family?"
"Yeah, and they're in favor 9 to 2."
Right After The Operation
Bill wakes up from a vasectomy and the doctor tells him he has good news and bad news. "The good news is we were able to save your testicles. The bad news is they're under your pillow."
What Really Happened To Bill
While doing the vasectomy, Bill's doctor slipped and cut off one of his testicles. In an effort to avoid a malpractice lawsuit, he replaced Bill's missing ball with an onion.
Two weeks later, Bill returned for a checkup. "How's your sex life?" the doc asked. "Pretty good, but I've had some strange side effects." "Like what?" the nervous doc asked anxiously. "Well, every time I pee my eyes water. When my wife gives me a blow job she gets heartburn. And every time I pass a hotdog stand, I get a hard-on."
Post-Op Final Check-Up
Six weeks after his vasectomy, Bill returns to his doctor for his scheduled semen test. The nurse hands him a little jar and points to a broom closet down the hall. After half an hour, he still hasn't come out - and a line is forming! So she puts her ear to the door to see if he is ok. All she can hear is lots of heavy breathing and grunting, so she goes back to her station and tells the other guys to wait their turn. Fifteen minutes later the guy finally comes out, red in the face and sweating. "I've tried everything," he says. "I've pulled it, I've twisted it, I've even pounded it on the sink, but I *still* can't open this damn jar!"
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)