Search Results for 'teacher'
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother.
The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: I'd like to go through one whole day without having to tell you off.
Pupil: You have my permission !
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: Will you stop looking at the clock at the wall and pay attention?
Pupil: Time will pass, but will you?
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
It was the first day of a new school year.
Three boys arrive at class late and the teacher asks the first boy "Why are you tardy," the boy replies "I've been on Blueberry Hill" the teacher said "Take your seat."
She asks the next boy why he was late. "I was on Blueberry Hill also" he replied.
Then she asked the third boy, but he replied with the same answer.
As the boys we're sitting down a girl arrives in.
"Let me guess", said the teacher. "You where on Bluberry Hill aslo"
"NO.... I am Blueberry Hill" replied the girl.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Fred: I've added these figures ten times. Teacher: Good work! Fred: And here are my ten answers !
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: If I gave you three rabbits today and five rabbits tomorrow, how many rabbits would you have? Jackie: Nine. Teacher:
That's not right, you'd have eight. Jackie: No, Teacher, I'd have nine. I already have one rabbit at home!
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher : Tommy, put some more water in the fish tank ! Pupil : Why, Miss, I only put some in yesterday and he hasn't drunk that yet !
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
teacher;Agar sache dil se Rab' se dua ki jae to woh zaror pori hoti hai...!
Studendt'Rehne de Miss.....Agar aesa hota to aap meri Bewi hotien....!
by Waheed Goraya (few years ago!)
A foreign language teacher was explaining to her class that, unlike their English counterparts, French nouns are grammatically designated as masculine or feminine.
Things like 'chalk' or 'pencil,' she described, would have a gender association although in English these words were neutral. Confused, one student raised his hand and asked, "What gender is a computer?"
The French teacher wasn't sure which gender it was, so she ivided the class into two groups and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. One group was comprised of the women in the class, and the other of men. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation.
The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in masculine gender because:
1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem.
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model.
The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval.
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."
Groucho Marx
1890-1977
This reminds me of the student who began his Middle Ages story with:
"He was a dark and stormy knight...."
In a survey taken several years ago, all incoming freshman at MIT were asked if they expected to graduate in the top half of their class.
Ninety-seven percent responded that they did.
Q: What's the difference between a teacher and a train?
A: The teacher says "Get that gum out of your mouth", where as the train says "Chew, Chew ".
"The reason that every major university maintains a department of mathematics is that it is cheaper to do this than to institutionalize all those people."
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher: What is the axis of the earth?
Student: The axis of the earth is an imaginary line which passes from one pole to the other, and on which the earth revolves.
Teacher: Very good. Now, could you hang clothes on that line?
Student: Yes, Sir.
Teacher: Indeed, and what sort of clothes?
Student: Imaginary clothes, Sir.
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)
Teacher :
Y R U Late..?
All Ur Classmates Came To Class On Time..??!!
Student :
"Jhund Me Kutte Ate Hain Sir...
Sher To Akela Ata Hai...
by Pak101.com (few years ago!)